Join the KKK.

Spend one day in South Park.

Let Gingers bite you 3 times without blocking.

Defeat the Boss Hall Monitor while wearing freckles.

Fling a turd that you created at an enemy in combat.

Find Jesus while playing as a Jew.

Open all garages in South Park.

Sell nothing the entire game.

Fart on the Mayor, Father Maxi, Principal Vic, & Prime Minister.

Shit your pants during a boss battle.

Fart on a canine enemy while in Gnome form.

Hit 3 enemies with a single fart outside of combat.

Fart on each available buddy in the game.

Interrupt 5 channel attacks with a fart.

Defeat the Meth Tweekers while wearing the Evil Cartman goatee and the bald cap.

Successfully block every enemy attack in a single, non-tutorial battle.

Fart on 10 enemies in the world when they're knocked out.

Defeat at least 3 enemies in one battle while your buddy is unconscious.

Complete the game without ever ending a combat with a buddy knocked out.

Collect 5 Chinpokomon.

Collect 15 Chinpokomon.

Collect all the Chinpokomon.

Befriend your Dad.

Befriend Half of South Park.

Sell 300 junk items.

Kill 20 enemies with Cartman's ass.

Fart on people 100 times

Fart on animals 25 times.

Shit Your Pants in battle three times.

Complete half of the available costume sets.

Complete all available Costume Sets.

Befriend Crab People and Underpants Gnomes.

Score 100 perfect attacks.

Block 100 attacks.

Have Kenny Die 10 times in battle over the course of the game.

Unlock all the upgrades for one of the New Kid's abilities.

Spend $500.

Collect all the weapons and costumes available in the game.

Befriend all of South Park.

You defeated the High Jew Elf Kyle in battle.

You defeated the Grand Wizard Cartman in battle.

You befriended the Goths, like everyone else playing this game.

While inside Mr. Slave, you summoned Mr. Slave.

You defeated Princess Kenny while looking like David Hasselhoff.

You accepted your fate and chose the name Douchebag yourself.

You defeated Princess Kenny in your girl makeover disguise.

You defeated Princess Kenny while living with Dire AIDS.

You watched your parents have sex for 60 seconds.

You defeated Princess Kenny and recovered the Stick of Truth.

You farted on the corpse of an aborted Nazi Zombie fetus.